I really hate june. June is really a bad month for me.
It's only the start of june and so many things happen.
I dont know why is my pregnant life so hard.
From the time i know i am pregnant till now.
I dont know how many times have i cried so bad, felt so sad that
i feel that i should just die. I really wanted to just end my life.
But whenever i thought that i have a baby in me i cant do that.
He's the one that make me stay alive, and my parents.
I tried so hard to control my temper and emotion but i just cant do it.
It's not an excuse. When you are pregnant your hormones change alot,
and will really freak out even the slightest thing.
Maybe it's only a few like me will feel this way. But after i got pregnant,
my mood change very fast, faster that the weather.
And when i am sad, i felt twice as sad as compared to before i am pregnant.
I didnt ask for much. I only hope that he can understand me more and
give in to me more when i am pregnant. Just another 2 months plus.
I already said i need two more months.
Why cant you stand in my shoes and think for me?
Crying is bad for baby, but i have been crying for days already.
Since i am pregnant, i have to crying so frequently. Alot more than before.
And the feeling sucks! In this house, only you are some sort related to me.
You are my husband. Why must you hurt me so much?
I just wanna have a happy pregnancy and happy marriage. It's just that simple.
Isit that hard? I didnt ask for riches and things that are impossible.
I just want to be happy, i dont want to quarrel with you. Dont you get it?
I love you so much, and it hurts me so so so much when we quarrel.
I am very afraid that we will end up no where. Seems like we have never ending
troubles and obstacle. And i am so tired of it. Tired of everything.
I dont know how long more i can tolerate. I want to go home so much,
with my dad and mum. They are the only ones that will love and dote me forever.
And they will never hurt me like you did, like your mum did.
Felt so pressurised and stress staying in this house, especially when they are around.
I tried my best to communicate and get along with his mum already.
But it dont work at all. She's so hard to get along. The generation gap is so big,
she's 40 years older than me. I really dont know how to get along with her.
I am so tired, i feel that i am going insane soon.
The day when i really get sick of everything, and all the nonsense and tolerating,
everything will be over. And you can get your son another wonderful
daughter in law. One that you approve and like.
We love each other so much but we have been hurting each other.
And the hurt i got is something you can never imagine.
I remember everything deep in my heart, and it becomes scar.
I love you husband, can you stop hurting me?
Can we stop quarreling? Can you give in to me more?
I only want to be happy, have a happy family. Nothing else.
It's only the start of june and so many things happen.
I dont know why is my pregnant life so hard.
From the time i know i am pregnant till now.
I dont know how many times have i cried so bad, felt so sad that
i feel that i should just die. I really wanted to just end my life.
But whenever i thought that i have a baby in me i cant do that.
He's the one that make me stay alive, and my parents.
I tried so hard to control my temper and emotion but i just cant do it.
It's not an excuse. When you are pregnant your hormones change alot,
and will really freak out even the slightest thing.
Maybe it's only a few like me will feel this way. But after i got pregnant,
my mood change very fast, faster that the weather.
And when i am sad, i felt twice as sad as compared to before i am pregnant.
I didnt ask for much. I only hope that he can understand me more and
give in to me more when i am pregnant. Just another 2 months plus.
I already said i need two more months.
Why cant you stand in my shoes and think for me?
Crying is bad for baby, but i have been crying for days already.
Since i am pregnant, i have to crying so frequently. Alot more than before.
And the feeling sucks! In this house, only you are some sort related to me.
You are my husband. Why must you hurt me so much?
I just wanna have a happy pregnancy and happy marriage. It's just that simple.
Isit that hard? I didnt ask for riches and things that are impossible.
I just want to be happy, i dont want to quarrel with you. Dont you get it?
I love you so much, and it hurts me so so so much when we quarrel.
I am very afraid that we will end up no where. Seems like we have never ending
troubles and obstacle. And i am so tired of it. Tired of everything.
I dont know how long more i can tolerate. I want to go home so much,
with my dad and mum. They are the only ones that will love and dote me forever.
And they will never hurt me like you did, like your mum did.
Felt so pressurised and stress staying in this house, especially when they are around.
I tried my best to communicate and get along with his mum already.
But it dont work at all. She's so hard to get along. The generation gap is so big,
she's 40 years older than me. I really dont know how to get along with her.
I am so tired, i feel that i am going insane soon.
The day when i really get sick of everything, and all the nonsense and tolerating,
everything will be over. And you can get your son another wonderful
daughter in law. One that you approve and like.
We love each other so much but we have been hurting each other.
And the hurt i got is something you can never imagine.
I remember everything deep in my heart, and it becomes scar.
I love you husband, can you stop hurting me?
Can we stop quarreling? Can you give in to me more?
I only want to be happy, have a happy family. Nothing else.
